the neverending saga of the mother of the bride dress...

I have everything planned for our wedding. Well, you know, all of the BIG things. There are still a few outstanding items that will need to be decided prior to August 2nd.

OH! I ALMOST FORGOT!!! We're NOT moving, y'all! We decided that it was just too crazy to try to pull off a move and get married in the same year. We're going to wait until 2015 and then reassess the moving situation - this time we'll try to head West instead of East, too. All in all, I'm very happy with this decision.

So, here are the things that I've crossed off my list:
- Venue - Lincoln City, Oregon beach
- Reception dinner - the lady from the Inn where we are staying is catering our dinner/cake
- Invitation list - Only our immediate families and their significant others and then my bestie and her husband... no kids!
- Dress - I found it on BHLDN for half off and ordered it - it was perfect!
- Invitations - I had them specially designed on etsy and I have them in my posession
- Floral designer
- Photographer - This was actually number one on my list. We had our engagement photos the other day and I will share them in a later blog post... they. are. awesome.
- Wedding jewelry
- Officiant
- Hair - luckily my brother is a hair stylist
- Make up artist

So, like I said... I have a few things I still need to nail down, but I'm mostly done. The whole entire thing has been really easy and even fun, however, there has been one kink thrown into everything: MY MOTHER.

She had asked me what she should wear... I showed her pics of what I was wearing, what bestie was wearing and we talked about what I envisioned for everyone else... I guess I wasn't clear because here are the first two dresses that she sent me...

Yup. Totally neutral/solid. And long. Good job, Mom.


or this one... which SAYS IN THE TITLE THAT IT IS A SWIMSUIT COVERUP!!!
My Mom really is this crazy... Sorry I couldn't get the picture to paste.

Ugh. So after THOSE disasters, I decided to call her and reiterate my three requirements:
1. It is neutral, solid color
2. It is long
3. It is not made of jersey material

Am I asking too much?! (That was rhetorical, by the way...)

So I think we are FINALLY on the same page. I had pinterested some dress ideas for her. We finally agreed on a couple. I am feeling much better about the whole scenario.

Cut to several days later when she sends me a BRIGHT RED anthro dress. This dress is definitely not a neutral color.

That woman is giving me a heart attack! I thought maybe I was just being a bridezilla, but I even double checked with the ferret and he agreed that I was not being crazy.

I mean, I am paying good money for an awesome photographer and I don't want her messing up the photos. I would love to buy the photos that he takes for us of our family, but maybe that is asking too much.

I'm officially spent. Wish me luck that this "situation" improves over the next couple weeks...

meet snorty mcsnortsalot.

Last May, the ferret and I happened upon a posting on facebook by one of his friends giving up the cutest of cute french bulldogs. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it), we have *slight* obsession with frenchies (read: MAJOR OBSESSION), so after thinking about it for at least five minutes, we decided to message his friend and tell him that we would take him, arrange for shipment from UTAH and that we were super excited about our new family member.

You have met Mae Mae, so now you must meet Titus Dexter, or Dexter as we call him.

I know, I know, he's really cute, isn't he? Titus was his old name, but we liked Dexter, so we gave him that as a middle name and then call him by his middle name, like we do to Andi Mae. Dexter, Dex, Dexy Dog, Snorty, Yuck Mouth, Monkey, T. Dex, Dexty, Snorts... I mean, really the list goes on. He's six years old and is 19 lbs of awesomeness. He loves to cuddle. He and Mae get along fabulously, although it was a little nerve wracking in the beginning. He wasn't fixed, so all he wanted to do was hump Mae and, let me tell you, that is her least favorite thing EVER.

I was a nervous wreck. He couldn't keep his food down, his tail was balding, they weren't getting along, but dang he was cute. So we stuck in it.

Y'all, I highly don't recommend purebred dogs. We were so used to Andi, who basically takes care of herself, and we got thrown into this high maintenance dog. But I guess this is just good practice for when we decide to have little ferrets of our own, am I right? haha.

So, we've have him about 8 months now, and he is still the quirkiest (is that word?!) dog ever, but he is such a huge part of our life and our family. Stay tuned for the many adventures of the Dexy dog. It should make for some good reading. :)

Close eyes. Deep breath. Jump in.

You know when you were a kid and it was too early in the spring to get in the swimming pool, but you were so excited that it was decently warm outside that you just couldn't help yourself? I would always get so nervous thinking about how cold the water would be once I jumped in. But I always knew I'd acclimate to the cold temperature & then be glad I jumped in. Sometimes that's hard for me to remember as an adult: the nervousness and trepidation surrounding doing something is oftentimes worth it in the end.

There are some really big things going on in my life. And I need to write about it, so I can sort my thoughts and document what is surely life-changing stuff. This is for me and no one else. Sorry, but you're just going to have to put on your big girl panties and deal.

So much has happened since I was last here. The thing I'm most glad to report is that the ferret is still in my life and things with him are going swimmingly. In fact, we've even turned things up a notch and last October, he decided to make things legit. Yeah, that's right... The ferret and I are getting hitched and I've been sporting some bling on my left hand. Very pretty bling, if I do say so myself. But that's another story for another time.

Equally notable (and a big reason for why I'm taking up the blogging gig again), he is looking for a job in another state. Several other states. That's right, I'm finally getting the heck out of Texas. Which is super exciting and awesome. But also makes me want to shit my pants.

Originally it started with a plan to move to Portland to be closer to my parents and my brother (who just moved there a week ago), but then it morphed into "well, what would you say about moving to California?" umm, heck yes?! And then, it morphed into "well, I also have offers in Hawaii... ooh and if we go to the East Coast, I'll make even more money." Ummm WHAT? East Coast? Come again?

But then it started to be a very real option. Massachusetts or  New Jersey. I can't handle cold weather, but they do both have good sea food, and it would be easy to travel around and see that part of the US since everything is close together. And we're closer to Europe?? (so maybe I'm stretching a little... haha) I mean we're talking about places I've never even set foot in... not even in the airport.

A big part of me knows that I can be happy anywhere... especially if I'm with my ferret. But this is some crazy shit, y'all. Who knows what this might lead us to? It could be the best decision we've ever made. It could be the worst. But I've spent way to much time in my life being hesitant about things and playing it safe. I didn't do that with ferret and that's one of the reasons why we've had the best relationship. We take chances. We go on adventures. We have fun.

So I just need to look at it as that... another adventure. The good thing about it, is my job said I can work from home. That I won't have to quit my job, so there is that. Which helps. A LOT. But dealing with all this and wedding planning... especially when we are getting married in Oregon so I'm planning it long distance, which adds a little extra stress. We are only having our parents and siblings and my bestie come, so it shouldn't be that difficult/stressful to plan and it hasn't been so far, so that's good. But it still adds an extra element.

This is where I need to rely on my faith. And quit worrying. Worrying is definitely my least favorite characteristic I inherited from my mom, but I'm working on that.

Like I said before, this could be the greatest adventure and the best decision we ever made.

Close eyes. Deep breath. Jump in.

why, hello there.

i really am awful at this blogging thing. i'd blame it on something but i can't quite think of a good excuse.

anywho, just breaking the long tradition of silence on this blog to bring you two super genius observations of life in general. (you thought i was dead, didn't you? i don't blame you) you may want to sit down because these are earth shattering:

1. it is dangerous to eat popcorn while wearing a vneck.

2. it is impossible to eat freshly popped popcorn secretly in a cube at work.

i know. you're impressed. so am i. hence why i had to pop back here to share this great insight.

happy hump day, y'all.

meet miss mae

Happy Friday, everyone!

i'm alive!

which almost wouldn't have been possible if the flying cooler that fell out of the back of a truck on the highway had succeed in brutally assaulting me today. fortunately for me, the mini is nimble and the cooler's evil attempt at manslaughter was thwarted. definitely fortunately for me. maybe fortunately for you if you're reading this. or maybe not. you decide.

if anyone actually read this thing, i'm sure they would have wondered by now where the hell i went for the last four months... but since no one does, i figure i'm safe to sneak back.

life. it has been interesting. to say the least.

i believe last time i was here, i was writing about the wonderfully awful sickness that i have had ever since i got my guardasil shot. well... i'm happy to say that WE HAVE A DIAGNOSIS! woot!

i decided, after about $500 in doctor's visits and tests that yielded no more than a shrug from the doctor, to bite the bullet and go to a homeopathic doctor (read: hippie doctor) that my brother's friend had recommended. yeah, yeah, i know. roll your eyes. i did. but AFTER rolling my eyes, i called the office and set up an appointment.

the office is about thirty minutes from my house... so not super close or anything, which left me plenty of time to freak out about the bazillion things he was going to recommend to me that would ultimately freak me out enough to go back to the regular doctors... or what i then referred to as "real" doctors. electrotherapy shock treatments, sacrificing virgins (speaking of... do you know any just in case? i don't!), ancient burial rituals (wait, do you do those if no one is dead?), the list went on and on...

i walked in the door... everything looked normal. which made me even more suspicious. then i nervously sat in the waiting room and waited (which is kind of redundant now that i think about it). they called my name and i got a tour of the office... here's the chiropractor (normal), here are the restrooms (also normal), here are the exam rooms (extremely normal)... at this point in the tour, i started to feel a little irritated. i mean, i had come up with all these awesomely creepy ideas of what it was going to be like and i was sorely disappointed. where are all the people strumming guitars and playing kumbaya FORGODSAKES?

and then. it was when i saw it. THE PRAYER WALL. i shit you not. who knew hippies were so spiritual? oh wait, i probably should have known. anyway, the chick giving me the tour was going on and on about how much they believe in prayer (which is cool and i fully support this idea) and then put me on the spot and asked me to write something on the wall. well, i'm no good when i'm put on the spot... and all i could think about praying about was that i hoped the tillamook reserve extra sharp white cheddar cheese i had brought back from oregon hadn't gone bad already. so we skipped that part.

after the prayer wall, we came to this giant room with huge windows and a crap load of recliners with people in them... just hanging out... getting IVs. yeah it was weird. kind of looked like some strange science experiment... or maybe aliens had landed and were planning to take over these people's bodies. who knows. apparently, according to my tour guide, these IVs are really helpful and can heal people of many, many sicknesses and implant a tiny computer chip in your vein so you can be tracked at all times. ok, maybe she didn't say the last part. but my brain was more than happy to tell me she did, so i began to freak out... again.

i met with the doctor and he looked me over with a fine toothed comb. i'm serious. i don't think i've ever had anyone ask me as many questions or look me over as thoroughly, so he gets bonus points for that for sure. turns out, i have hypothyroidism... and i'm extremely deficient in vitamin D. so i got prescribed some thyroid meds and was told to take vitamin D every day. easy enough. AND THEN HE HUGGED ME. which was awkward. because i have boundaries, y'all. and letting my doctor touch me in a non-doctorly way is totally infringing on said boundaries. but i let him do it. and my skin crawled the whole time. but you know what? i'm still alive. i guess hugs CAN'T kill you. weird.

ever since i started his regimen he requested i've been feeling a TON better. so... yeah, now i love hippie doctors. i've been converted. fully. i'm even thinking about getting an "i love hippie doctors" tattoo... for some reason the ferret nixed that idea, but whatever... i have ways of changing his mind ;)

p.s.

there was a cockroach in our bed the other night. needless to say mr. bug guy drove his happy butt out to our house to spray the little motherfuckers right this time. kill 'em dead, son!

i ain't sleeping with no cockroaches.

i already have to sleep with a ferret.*

i have limits, y'all.

*disclaimer: he's just a guy that i lovingly refer to as ferret. but still.

p.p.s. i have no idea why but whenever i talk about cockroaches, i slip into redneck mode. it's a habit. hope you're cool with it. it's ok if you're not.